Posted by: zyxo | August 26, 2011

Why computers go bananas without any reason


“After that the computer froze a few times over the course of a couple days, so I assumed… So, I have no clue what is going on”.

“My computer randomly freezes,… What might be the problem?”

“Your computer was working fine, but then suddenly started locking up… ometimes random lockups can be attributed to the computer memory…”

When you google “computer freezes” you get thousends of desperate people asking for help. Mostly it can be solved by checking hardware, software etc.

But occasionaly it occurs that something goes wrong for no reason whatsoever, and then it never happens again. Why?

At work we had such a problem: less than once a year our SAS software refused to run our programs. Exactly the same programs we were used to run daily, weekly, monthly without any problems. Googling the error message was no help. Obviously the software was on strike. Temporarily, because the following morning everything was back to normal.
What happened ?

After deep thought, eliminating all impossible possibilities, I came up with the only plausible explanation I could find.
This is what I wrote to my collegues :

“Dear collegues,
I now know the reason of the problems: it’s what we call the IT Ghost, a species of creatures from the 5th dimension which are migrating this time of the year from the Betelgeuze area to the Crab nebula and are eventually teleporting through the earth. On this occasion they can influence the spin of some Charm Quarks causing computer processes to behave erratically, with no obvious reason.
A positronic energy field of 5.000 trillion petavolt around the earth should solve the problem.”

The Crab Nebula, the shattered remnants of a s...

Image via Wikipedia

Do you have any better explanation  :-)

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